


OTP IDEA DUMP (PROMPTS)

by CakecroftAteAPieFacedScone



Category: Sherlock (TV), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Mostly Mentioned Characters, Not a Crossover, So yeah, but idk if theyre original enough, i want to write theeem, these are just ideas, uhhhh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-24
Packaged: 2018-05-03 02:51:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5273729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CakecroftAteAPieFacedScone/pseuds/CakecroftAteAPieFacedScone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Like the title says these are just some ideas (or just little passages) I had and texted my friend about so they'll be in different states of excitement, please forgive any errors.<br/>Also, the prompt part, if anyone can do my ideas any justice that would be awe-fucking-maze-balls. (I'd love to read that!)<br/>Or if you happen to know any fics with the same basic idea PLEASE LET ME KNOW I WOULD LOVE TO READ THAT TOO!!!</p><p>Thanks and enjoy.</p><p>Updated chapter 7!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. John Has A Daddy Kink/Sherlock Loves Suits (On Jawn)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SO YEAH   
> I LIKED THIS  
> TOWARDS THE END I LOST IT  
> AND LAUGHED SO HARD   
> I DIDN'T FINISH  
> MY FRIEND WAS DISAPPOINTED   
> BUT LOVED IT

Lots ofJohn getting cuddled and coddled and treated so fluffy while kicking hard ass and being such a bamf and getting squishy with Sherly and so many things  
But also John getting spanked when he's naughty and being rewarded when he's been a good boy and and and showing off for daddy Sherly 

So like they're on a case right but Sherlock is so distracted by John being in this suit that literally screams fuck me cuz he just came back from some doctor stuff  
And John being cute and oblivious solves the case instead and because Sherlocks attention is so focused on John he can't help but almost come in his pants because damn was that sexy as fuck and why is John looking at him with such wide trusting eyes and beautifully sinful smile down little Sherly  
After they get back to 221b Sherlock drags John upstairs by his tie anJohn poor baby is feeling a little hot so once they're upstairs he asks Sherlock what's up and Sherlock is all manic starts devouring John's mouth  
Poor Johnny can't keep up so he pushes Sherlock away and undoes his tie looking Sherlock in the eye and says im flattered Sherlock really and now he sounds a little breathless but I thought you weren't interested.... and he stops because Sherlock is getting naked and holyfuck are those freckles down Johnny  
And John stands there all hot in his suit and Sherlock all NUDE and giving John these sex eyes and Sherlock takes John tie and ties John's hands behind his back and then starts unbottoning his vest and shirt slowly because he wants to worship John  
And John the dear is all blushy and hot and wants to call sherlock his daddy and where did that come from  
But it slips out anyway and Sherlock who was halfway to John's zipper /freezes/  
Now John's on his shoulders and knees and ohmygid he's kneeding my behind  
Sherlock quickly gets John's pants down to his knees and his blazer shirt and vest up to his pits and all Sherlock can do is stare because ohmygod JAWN and he starts kissing and sucking and leaving hickies everywhere he can and then he takes John's hot booty  
And leaves sexy bite marks on each cheek  
But gawd is he really gonna do thi- and then poor John not expecting that tongue yelps and comes on the carpet becausenohyeezus was that good  
And Sherlock poor bastard is in euphoria becaus John is so good and came with just his tongue and I need to be in him now but first  
Naughty boy coming without daddy's permission  
John moans because god I just came how am I hard again and turns his head to the side and says sorry daddy with such a beautiful keening noise Sherlock thinks but keeps a hard face because that was naughty and John's booty needs to be a bit cherry

Don't it


	2. The Hobbit AU Everyone Needs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its a bit jumbled together but I hope it makes some sense

WHAT IF THERE WAS AN AU WHERE THORIN AND BILBO WERE COURTING/MARRIED ALREADY(THRAINS DEAD NO GOLDSICKNESS) AND WERE HAPPILY GETTING COMFORTABLE TOGETHER AND EREBOR WAS ALL PROSPEROUS AND EVERYTHING WAS ALL GOOD AND THATS WHEN SMAUG COMES AND THEY LOSE EACHOTHER IN THE RUSH AND BILBO ENDS UP GETTING LOST FURTHER INTO THE MOUNTAIN WITH HALF THE COMPANY INCLUDING FILI AND KILI AND DIS AND THORIN THINKS HE LOST ALL HIS FAMILY AND HIS HOME AND HAS TO LEAD HIS PEOPLE AWAY WANTING TO FIGHT HIS WAY BACK TO HIS ONE BUT CAN'T AND BILBO IS TRYING TO DO HIS CONSORT STUFF AND CALM WHOMEVER WERE LUCKY TO LIVE AND TRY AND GET THEM OUT OF THE MOUNTAIN THINKING HE LOST THORIN FOREVER AND ENDS UP RIDDLING WITH SMAUG AND THEN SICKNESS STARTS SETTLING INTO SOME OF THE DWARVES AND THEY START FIGHTING AND BILBO GETS REALLY ILL BUT IS STILL FIGHTING FOR THORIN'S KIN AND THORIN IS OUT IN THE WILDERNESS TRYING TO GET TO THRANDUIL ASKING FOR AID TO GET HIS PEOPLE TO SAFETY AND TO GET HIS FAMILY BACK BUT THRANDY WANTS TO BE A DICK UNTIL THORIN MENTIONS BILBO AND HES ALL LIKE WHY DIDNT YOU SAY SO BUT THEN SUDDENLY HORNS IN THE DISTANCE AND ITS THE HOBBITS READY FOR BATTLE AND WILLING TO SAVE THE DWARVES AND BE RID OF SMAUG AND THE ELVES AND DWARVES THINKS ITS BECAUSE THEYRE SO KIND BUT IN REALITY SMAUG JUST TRAMPPLED OVER A VERY SPECIAL FIELD OF FLOWERS AND THEYRE FUCKING PISSED BUT IN THE MOUNTAIN THINGS ARE GETTING WORSE AND PEOPLE START THROWING UP BLOOD AND A MONTH PASSES BY AND STILL THEY CANNOT GET INTO THE MOUNTAIN AND THEY'RE ALL DYING  _SO SLOWLY_

_SO MUCH PAIN_

_BLAMING POOR BILBO ONLY DIS TO PROTECT HIM_

_OIN ONLY BEING ABLE TO DO SO MUCH WITHOUT AID AND READY TO LITERALLY RIP ANYONE APART IF THEY SO MUCH AS SNEEZE IN BO'S DIRECTION_

_BUBBIES FILI AND KILI STARVING YET BELIEVING UNCLE BO WILL GET THEM OUT IF UNCLE THORIN CAN'T GET IN_

_THORIN LOSING HIS MIND OVER THE SUPPOSED DEATH OF HIS FAMILY_

_BO NOT KNOWING IF THORIN WILL ACTUALLY COME BACK FOR HIM_

_THRANDUIL DEAD READY TO FLIP A BITCH BECAUSE VALA FUCK YOU IF YOU THINK I'M NOT GETTING THOSE FUCKING SCONES BILBO PROMISED ME YOU SHITS_

_THINK OF THE HOBBITS_

_ANGRY LITTLE CHIHUAHUAS REARING TO RIP INTO DRAGON FLESH WITH THEIR ANGRY POINTED MITHRIL TEETH_

_REVENGE SHALL BE THEIRS DAMMIT THOSE WERE THEIR BEST AZALEA FIELDS_

_AND LOBELIA'S BEST FUCKING HYDRANGEAS YOU DONKEY FUCKING SHIT EATER_

AU OF AU::::

Imagine the youngest of the company literally being so very young and scared but strong for their uncle Bilbo who will protect them from the dragon

what if Bilbo had kept them all alive for /years/ and finally when thorin was able to charge the mountain Bilbo was dying/dead from old age  
Considering I wanna make Bilbo young around his coming of age  
That'd be over 70/80 years of waiting  
Not knowing if smaug will kill them not knowing if thorin is alive

_all the anticipation_


	3. The Married Ones And John

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only it was a threesome   
> Maybe next time

What if sherlock cheated on John with one of Mrs turners married ones and the other married one caught them  
  
Starting with after he found out then in flashbacks  
  
John moves out  
Sherlock returns to drugs  
Turns out the married one had a meth problem   
  
Married One 2 feels for John  
Cuz you know   
They've just been cheated on  
  
Mrs Hudson throws out sherlock   
Mrs Turner throws out the married one  
  
Married One 2/John Watson 69evrrrr


	4. Johniarty With A Side Of Sherlock (Or Is It?!?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My non attempt at deep psychological horror

it's John and James right and James is crazy obsessed but John is in a somewhat established relationship with sherly but Jims known John since  they were widdle wobbly bubbies right this is au btdubbs and so they do a polygamous relationship right but then Jim and sherly become possessive and over bearing and then abusive until John can't take it anymore and kills them both 

And maybe it'll be written like how he tells/sees it in his mind laying in a mental hospital and they tell him it's all in his head that sherlock was his imaginary friend James was his rapist baby sitter and how that made John stab the shit out of him when he was like nine so he's fucking coocoocuchoo right then once it's over in his head he realizes he is in a crazy house and then out of the corner of his eye he sees sherlock again because sherlock was Johns sort of conscious so it's like he was deducing and stuff too but then sherlock fades and he sees the real image of James right and the last he remembers is James last words of how John will be his no matter what even if he had to teach him to be more obedient and then tada idk


	5. JOHN DRESSED AS ONE OF THE BALLERINAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PASSED THE POINT OF Nooo reeeetuuuuUUUURN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes.

JOHN DRESSED AS ONE OF THE BALLERINAS FROM PHANTOM OF THE OPERA  
JOHN SINGING CHRISTINE'S  SONG  
JOHN BEING HELD BY SHERLOCK AS SHERLOCK SINGS MUSIC OF THE NIGHT  
JOHN MARRYING SEBASTIAN AS THE VICONT INSTEAD OF SHERLOCK  
SHERLOCK AS THE VICOMTE INSTEAD OF THE PHANTOM AND MORIARTY IS THE PHANTOM  
  
_JOHN BEING HELD BY SHERLOCK AS SHERLOCK SINGS MUSIC OF THE NIGHT_  
  
_JOHN FALLING FOR SHERLOCK AS THE PHANTOM AND NOT BEING A DICK LIKE CHRISTINE_   
  
_JOHN AND SHERLOCK DUETING THINK OF ME_  
  
_**JOHN FUCKING DRESSED AS THE FUCKING BALLERINAS**_  
  
_**JOHN BEING DRESSED AS THE BALLERINAS**_  
  
GIVE ME ALL THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA/SHERLOCK CROSS OVERS PLEASE PLEASE  
  
_PLEASE_  
  
works well with johniarty im sure

 

 

~~john being dressed as one of the ballerinas~~  

 

aarchiart im waiting


	6. That Kilbo AU No One But Me Wants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Give me Older!Kili/Younger!Bilbo or give me Older!Kili/Younger!Bilbo !!!!!!!!!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this just turned out to be about everyone else LOL
> 
> I GOT SO EXCITED

Older!Kili and Younger!Bilbo wrong number au

Barely legal half of an otp

Older Kili 

Younger Bilbo 

Over Protective Bofuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (He will give you his signature smile you know the one where he melts your iceberg of a heart and fills the void that is your existence while twisting your guts into pretty bows for his toys if you so much as breath the wrong way in Bo's general vicinity.) (He's totally the tlacelel.)

Sweet But Will Battle You To The Death For Bo's Bread Pudding And You Better Prepare To Fucking Die Cuz You Will Bombur bitch don't fuck witchu 

Bifurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (Basically adopts Bo. **_HE'S GOT IT IN WRITIN'!_** )

Father Figure Fili (to Bo) (Because come on, he would totally side with Bo on anything as long as he keeps providing the goods. As in food. Maybe drugs too but sssshhhhhhh)

Scary But Secretly Shipping Older Kili/Younger Bilbo because yes Thorin (So you know, when Kili eventually fucks up, Thorin is going to be the one to help them sort it out emotionally constipated shit clog that he is)

The Cool Uncle That Embarrassingly Gives You Condoms In Front Of Your Entire Family At The Dinner Table When You Were Too Broke To Buy Them On Your Own And Your Still Virgin Boyfriend/Future Husband Walks In To This And Then Said Uncle Winks And Wolf Whistles When Said Hubby Turns Cherry Red Gives You The Eyes That Promise **_Revenge_** And Leaves ¡Frerin! everybody not dead haha  

Balin the Almighty Selfie Grandpa because we are not tired of this at all it is beautiful _**fight me**_

DO NOT TOUCH MY BABY BO OR I WILL FUCKING EAT YOU ALIVE  Dwalin 

Ori the Defender of Bo's Virginity (otherwise known as: Don't You Dare Touch Him Inappropriately Kilimanjaro Durin I Will Rip Your Fucking Balls Off And Ram Them So Far Up Your Asshole You'll Be Snorting Cum And Spitting Kids Ori The Librarian.)

Sleazy Yet Yeezy (Cuz we all know he is class personified) Nori (totally not tripping balls over how cute Bo is. _Nope_.)

Dori. _Because that's all that needs to be said_. Respect that. 

Mama Dis or better The Godmother.

GIVE ME VILI OR GIVE ME VILI BITCH I WILL CUT YOU (omg what if he's the obliviousy dad that everyone thinks is a moron but is secretly the mastermind behind Kili and Bo meeting OMGGGGG *SQUEALS LOUDLY HYSTERICAL AND UNCONTROLLED*)

Thinks He's Following Them Around Secretly But Is So Obvious Gloin (because come on Gloin is totes the covetous jeww goodbye)

Purposely Plays Deaf To Get The Filthy Dirt On Everyone And Embarrass Kili With His Loud Reminiscing Of His (kili's) Diaper Days Oin because we all want this trust me 

GANDALF IS BO'S ACTUAL ADOPTIVE FATHER AND IS TOTES IN LOVE WITH BIFUR AND THEY ARE A THING TRUST ME YOU NEED THIS RIGHT NOW YOU WILL LOVE IT IT IS SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN

Moyolehuani Kili 

He is devotedly stupidly madly in love and that's just him fawning over Bo's Honey Curls (Bo is just so yolyamanitzin how can Kí not love him!?!?!?)

Tlazohtlaloni Bilbo because he is a precious widdle wub wub chubby bubby (he's Kili's yolotli)

Bo is an xicohtencatl and Kili is a xochipilli (LMAOOOO KILI THE XOCHIPILLI) and that image will forever be imprinted on my mind

Bo could also be a huitzilli but it's not as cute.....

 

Adiós 


	7. Tone Deaf & Color Blind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title is ridiculous.  
> The emotion is real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IF SOMEONE GIVES ME THIS I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER PLEASE OHMYGOD I GOT SO EMOTIONAL I LOVE THIS PLEASE  
> I LITERALLY CRIED AND I FUCKING WROTE IT PLEASE
> 
> /PLEASE/

_Deaf Sherlock Blind John_

**Sherlock is Johns eyes and John is Sherlocks ears**  

_ALL THE MISCOMMUNICATION AND MISUNDERSTANDINGS ALL THE ANGST_

_ALL THE FLUFFFFFFFFFFFFFF_

_JOHN BEING ABLE TO JUST **FEEL** THE WAY SHERLOCK LOOKS AT HIM AND SHERLOCK SEEING THE SMUG LOOKING LIL SHIT FACE ON JOHN WITH EXASPERATED FONDNESS IN HIS OWN EYES EVEN THO JOHN CAN'T SEE AND SHERLOCK THINKING JOHNS EYES ARE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL ANYWAY AND THE WAY JOHN FEELS UP SHERLOCKS FACE AND THE LITTLE TOUCHES JUST TO MAKE SURE SHERLOCK IS **THERE RIGHT NEXT TO HIM** BECAUSE SHERLOCK IS SO SILENT _

_AND SHERLOCK MAKING LITTLE BRAILLE LOVE NOTES TO JOHN BEFORE HE FUCKING JUMPS AND JOHN FINDING THEM UNDER THE SKULL AND CRYING AND MYCROFT SEEING **ALL THE FUCKING PAIN IN JOHNS EYES** AND SHERLOCK FALLING ASLEEP EACH NIGHT TO THE MEMORY OF JOHNS LITTLE FUCKING HANDS ON HIS BACK AND THE FEEL OF HIS TINY HANDS IN HIS WHEN THEY'RE RUNNING AND THE VIBRATIONS OF JOHNS CHEST WHEN SHERLOCK ASKED HIM TO SING_

_AND HOW JOHN USE TO JUST **KNOW** HOW HE FELT_

_AND HOW MUCH SHERLOCK WANTED TO HEAR JOHNS VOICE AND SHERLOCK COMING BACK TO JOHN WITH A HEARING AID **JUST TO FUCKING HEAR JOHN YELL AT HIM FOR HOURS** AND JOHN NOT SEEING SHERLOCK FOR MONTHS AFTER JUST TO COME BACK TO 221B WITH NEW EYES FINALLY BEING ABLE TO SEE _

_AND THEY JUST GO FUCK IT AND GET MARRIED HAVE BUBBIES AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER FUCKING AFTER FUCK YOU MORIARTY FUCK YOU MARY FUCK OFF FUCK_

_FUCK FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK FUCK MY LIFE FUCK THIS OHMYGOD_

_FUCK_

 

_OHMYGOD SHERLOCK WANTING TO HEAR JOHN SAY HIS NAME_

**_HOW HE MOANS_ **

**_HIS LAUGH_ **

**_HIS HEARTBEAT_**

**_HEAR JOHNS FUCKUGLY POETRY_ **

_JOHN WANTING TO SEE SHERLOCKS SOFT CURLY HAIR THAT HE TOUCHES ALL THE FUCKING TIME_

_WANTS TO SEE THE SKIN HE FEELS UP JUST BECAUSE HE CAN BUT USES THE EXCUSE OF NOT WANTING TO USE HIS CANE_

_JOHN WANTING TO LOOK BACK INTO SHERLOCKS EYES LIKE HE KNOWS THE FUCKWAD DOES TO HIM_

_WANTS TO SEE SHERLOCKS LONG FINGERS PLAYING THE VIOLIN_

**_WANTING TO SEE THOSE DUMB CUPID BOW LIPS BECAUSE FUCK KNOWS HE TOUCHES THEM SOFTLY ALL THE TIME TO GET SHERLOCK TO SHUT UP_ **

 

 

do you hear that

 

that is the sound of my shriveled heart dying an agonizing death 

 

Update:

REMEMBER MY BLIND JOHN DEAF SHERLOCK AU OKAY SHERLOCK LOVES THE WAY JOHNS FACE KINDA WINKLES ND hiS NOSE DOES THE THING AND HIS TEETH ARE ALL PEARLY LIKE JT IN FAIRLY ODD PARENTS WHEN HE LAUGHS AND SHERLOCK WANTS TO HEAR JOHNS LAUGH BUT REALLY JOHN DOESN'T MAKE A SOUND BECAUSE HE HASN'T ACTUALLY LAUGHED INAN ACTUALLY LONG TIME AND SOMEHOW JOHN FIGURED IT OUT BUT THEN SHERLOCK JUMPS AND JOHN DOESN'T EVEN SO MUCH AS  GRIMACE SO WHEN HE AND SHERLOCK GET PAST JOHN BEATING THE ABSOLUTE SHIT OUT OF SHERLOCK A YEAR LATER SHERLOCK CAN HEAR HIM NOW AND JOHN CAN SEE HIS PRETTY FACE SO WHEN SHERLOCK MAKES FUNNY FACES JUST TO MAKE JOHN LAUGH ONE DAY JOHN ACTUALLY DOES THE SOUND AND HIS FACE DO THE THING AND SHERLOCK JUST SITS AND IS IN NIRVANA RIGHT NOW AND JOHN SEES THE STUPIDLY IN LOVE FACE ON SHERLOCK HE LEANS OVER FOR AND KISS AND ND MISSES ON PURPOSE LIKE THE FIRST KISS WHEN JOHN WAS STILL BLIND AND SHERLOCK THE DOE EYEd THING AND KISSES JOHN BREATHLESS AND THEY ARE HAPPY YES OKAY

**Author's Note:**

> As mentioned in my tags, I'm not sure if anyone has written about these ideas before, so I hope they're original enough, but thanks for reading!


End file.
